Since I’m lacking in the amazingly bad album section right now and saving what I have for October I am going to delve into a few avaunt guarde pieces I have been looking forward to tackling. Here at the book we do more than just attack bad albums. I like to take a look at all aspects of music. Weigh the pros and the cons and tell you, the reader, exactly what is up with this. I have written for publications where I wasn’t allowed to flame a bad album. It was the “Say something nice or don’t say anything at all” type of work. I really loathe that bullshit. If I think the album has little merit, is not more than a corporate money making hack job, or deviates from the true path just to make money I will be letting you and all of the true music fans, the potential fans, out there know. So what have I, the one and only Hydro, brought to you this day in early August. I have found a major label release (Universal/Motown) that is abrasive, experimental, and yet very catchy by the minimalist electronic group Crystal Castles. Any fucking band that names themselves after one of my favorite Atari games gets a few points in my book.
What strikes me first about this record would be that it is equally as edgy as anything Skinny Puppy put out back in the 1980s. Many of the songs have a strong beat and a hook that is big enough to catch a megalodon. The outfit of Alice Glass and Ethan Kath started this project back in the early 2000’s based out of Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Canada does three things very well: Hockey, beer, and oddball electronic music groups. I’m probably loosing “punk rock credentials” right now by saying I’m into shit with drum machines and keyboards. I’ve always been into that the danceable stuff…even before the Misfits. So if you don’t like that then you blow a goat. Now for posterity’s sake, keep in mind that I don’t get into indie rock at all. Most bands that consider themselves “Indie” just piss me of. They have no piss and vinegar. Which in my opinion is the spinal column of rock n’ roll. I don’t care how you present the music. I will give any band a chance, and I try and articulate if it is not my style of music. However, I don’t care how genius they think their music is bands like Coldplay suck. Actually, Coldplay sucks, just for the record. If you consider yourself some form of rock outfit you must come off with some gritty gusto to be taken seriously. Crystal Castles accomplishes this with strength, grace, and a form of endurance not seen in many bands today.
Every single distorted beep and oddly timed loop is purposeful. It is hard to explain the undeniable seal of truly magnificent artwork. Think of this as the difference between paints by Michelangelo and the newest add for Kellogg’s Corn Flakes. It is hard to articulate exactly what the difference is (Art Historians and Art Critics excluded) that makes them so yin and yang, but we just know there is a difference.
Now comes the real question; is this band and record perfect? No, under no circumstance is this record perfect. This was not handed down by the gods of rock to Iggy Pop, Tony Iommi, and Getty Lee who ushered it into the minds of Crystal Castles. No band is unfaultable. No band, EVER, has released an all out perfect record…not even Led Zeppelin (but they came damned close with Zeppelin I). I can only imagine with this kind of chaotic mess that Crystal Castles live show is vastly different from their albums. It would take a team of synth masters to control this type of music. I would hate to think that much of the backing songs are just run from a CD player over the PA. Obviously, I have not seen them live. I can only speculate. Another issue with this is that I can not understand any of the lyrics. Really though, the lyrics are merely a formality to these songs. The real highlight is the danceable chaos in the music. Ms. Glass has a fine voice when it shines through the vocal effects. This fits the song style, but can be an annoyance when wanting to know what the fuck she is talking about. Really I’m nitpicking right now. For what this is, musically, I can see no problems. If you want something to chill out too or a solid dance floor experience then this would be something to slap in the ol’disk player. The highlight tracks we have here follow as: Baptism, Suffocation, Birds, I am Made of Chalk. This band is suggested if you are into experimentalism, old industrial (redundant to experimentalism), trip hop, and sci fi movie soundtracks.
This is an easy 8 out of 10. So dig it.
Now see, I can write a review on a good album. However, I do this for my sanity. Oh yes, I have to get back to the shit. Next week we tackle something hideous…something down right horrid…something by the graveyard. Ugh…something from Planet 13?
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